Is this ok?...

I've created a new series now that we're past all the Wedding Magic (7-7-07 wedding date included). I've decided to create a nice paper series with questions that will provide you a little bit of information about paper etiquette, styles, fonts, techniques etc so you are more knowledgeable about this world of paper. Look for our Is This OK series on Fridays. Here's the kick off question for our series…

Once friends and family know you design wedding invitations suddenly you become the consummate expert on not just invitations but also weddings. Recently I was asked a question… "Is it ok to include where we're registered with our invitations?" Before I share my answer I have had many friends and family include these lovely cards with their beautiful designs that sometimes coordinate to your wedding colors On the front it says the name of the store with your names on the back (or vice versa). Of course because of their elegance and how well they fit into your wedding invitations its natural to think that if they give them to you then you should put them in your invitation. Right?

WRONG!

Including registry cards is considered impolite. Of course you ask... Says Who? Well plenty of etiquette experts, Emily Post included will tell you--Don't Do It! Why, you ask? Lets make it simple. This is an event that you are hosting and have invited close friends and family to celebrate with you. You're guest are invited to your wedding because you want them to come. To expect them to come and bring a gift in etiquette rules is expecting more from your guest than they really have to give. In all honesty my dear Bride you should not expect a gift. GASP! I know the world of registry will crumble on those words—OK not really. Before you stop eyeing that lovely Kate Spade or Vera Wang place setting and flatwear, I do have to say we all know you will get gifts. What we should focus on is how to tell invited guest where to go to get your Kate Spade place settings.

Instead of placing that lovely card in your invites, use it in your bridal shower invitations. What will happen is those friends and family invited to your showers will spread the word about where you're registered. It's ok if people ask your parents or other friends because that way they know specifically where to go to find you a gift. Now I know many of us want to use the cards but everything you get Ms. Bride from your vendors you don't have to use and the registry cards are something that should not mix with your wedding invitations.